mid life crisis

if i am having a midlife crisis, does that mean i will only wind up being 74?
its been rough lately. i had a total breakdown when we got back from ogden. i am tired of looking like ass all the time, tired of bad hair, bad skin, ever increasing body fat % due to lack of exercise, always being tired. so i had my breakdown, and then i went shopping. totally a risky move when feeling so horrible, but i went to nordstrom and found one of the sales girls there, brooke and told her i needed an overhaul. SHE WAS AWESOME. we picked out some jeans to start with, then she asked me what i was looking for in tops. i said nothing clingy and nothign that needed dry cleaning. she said i was really testing her fabric knowledge, but we looked at all the tags. she didn't discourage me from picking things out to try, but funny how the things i picked looked like ASS but the things she picked were super cute. but first we started with the denim, as she put it. she told me to try them on in a certain order. she got me different sizes and when i tried the smaller size and was freaking out by all the ass rolls, i asked her to come in the room and look. she said the ass rolls are exactly what they want to see! who knew??? so i picked out two pairs of skinny jeans. omg, yes, TWO. SKINNY jeans. i tried on some leggings and they looked horrible, but the skinny jeans were good.
then the tops. she brought me things to layer them all with and when i said i didn't like something she didn't try to convince me otherwise and instead just took it away and brought something else. it was awesome. i wound up with a TON of stuff, including a poncho?? what? when she was ringing me up, i asked her if she could go to shoes with me. she said she couldn't but called down there to see if her favorite shoe guy was there. he wasn't but that was ok. i did get a pair of boots but after determining they were too big around the calves i have since returned them. now i want to go back and see brooke again and see if i can hire her to be my stylist, at least for a day. go through my stuff and my shoes and all that stuff and help me put some stuff together. i did get some accessories, too, which i have been trying to encorporate every day. its been fun. NOW if only i could get my hair and face under control.
i did put my fake bangs on the other day and looked into some hair extensions. working on it. and so excited that i picked up the groupon for eyelash extenstions! cannot wait!! hate to be so obsessed with how i look, but i'm not getting any younger. and OMG the gray hairs!! wtf.
but PT is going pretty well. i have some set backs every once in a while, like yesterday i wore soem totally sensible old lady boots to work. they are aersoles for goodness sake!! low, very sensible heel, totally safe. until about 90 minutes into the work day and i realized i really really needed to take them off. luckily i brought my sandals and i changed out of them, and almost instantly the acute discomfort i was having in my back went away. i was sitting the whole time - how does that happen? anyway, those boots are going away, especially since i suspected them of sabotauging me in the past!!!. then i sat weird on the couch while using the computer and while that was ok, unfolding from it was not ok. thorough back agitation. but PT this morning fixed it. i rode on the trainer the other day!! how hooray is that? big time hooray!! and i was happy to figure out that the reason the 20 minutes i did the other day were so hard was because eric had cranked up the resistance! but i was happy to be spinning again. and swimming is going awesome. still with the pull buoy but that is more to my liking anyway. i can feel swim improvement happening! but serious lack of motivation it me the other day and i did nothing but be grumpy. i am on a leg shaving strike!! its really gross. when the PT did some work on my IT band i appologized for the extreme fur on my legs, i am not sure i have ever let it get this long, but i am protesting my injury. ok, so i did shave them before going to ogden - couldn't let dan hugo see them in that shape!! but they are baad. eric said, hmph, not a big deal, his are hairier. but still its gross.
but some good stuff going on. getting through it. not thrilled with the winter approaching but looking forward to progressing to a run here someday soon.